Wrote this to my iPhone notes the other day:
Some of my older male friends are weird about doing more than briefly shaking hands when you meet. You will accept the MulleyHug, dislike it all you like mofo. The younger generations of men are fine with contact, comfortable with hugging each other, enjoying their closeness. Might be a softening due to liberal attitudes, more interactions with girls and gays perhaps. Who knows for sure but touchy feely is nice. The yearning to touch and be touched, physically and emotionally is surely a natural human condition. We’re not talking public face fucking, like.
Then this popped up via Kottke yesterday:
David Brooks argues that over time, people (especially men) have become more emotionally intelligent and that this shift might be responsible for a significant portion of our cultural progress.
and Brooks points out:
Body type was useless as a predictor of how the men would fare in life. So was birth order or political affiliation. Even social class had a limited effect. But having a warm childhood was powerful. As George Vaillant, the study director, sums it up in “Triumphs of Experience,” his most recent summary of the research, “It was the capacity for intimate relationships that predicted flourishing in all aspects of these men’s lives.”
Or maybe it’s just the iPad effect, all this touching instead of pointing and clicking from a safe distance.
I have a rule. If a hug is coming, lean into it.
I still havent figured when to kiss a woman hello / goodbye on the cheek though…
Alan
The willingness to embrace and hug, double kiss or do the two handed handshake (one hand over the others or one the arm) I think reflects connectivity. If we are connected then no one will get left behind. xx