Fiona De Londras has a post on Gay Pride up on IrishElection. Update 2: Suzy has a post too on this.
(Update 3: To clarify I thought Fiona’s post was wonderful and there should be more coming out stories for people to read and relate to.)
I’m totally cynical about gay pride parades. (See my views about the Pride parade in Cork last year.) To me it’s a once a year spectacle where all those afraid to leave their hairdressing salons and gay bars come out in force and let people know that gays exist. Like people didn’t know this. To me it’s quite insulting that the parades use the idea of furthering gay rights when it’s just another excuse to put on mascara and glitter and get drugged and drunk. How many that partake in those parades have ever actually campaigned for equal rights? Fiona is a tiny minority.
How many actually live in the world outside the clammy incestuous gay community? The parade seems more like a bunch of queers invading the straight world for a half day and then they’ll all disappear into the gay bars again by nightfall. They should be proud of who they are all the time and without the crutch of the drag queen in 10inch high heels. A community that demands integration but hides out in gay bars and refuses to mix with any of the rest of the community doesn’t deserve to be taken seriously. Though the Pride parades of nowadays seem to suggest they don’t want to be.
There’s a lot more to be done in regards to equality in this country yet I don’t see most of those attending the parades as the ones doing it.
EDIT: Hello to the QueerID folks that Declan sent this way.
There is a difference between a march and a parade.
Should the gay pride parade be a march?
Ignoring random homophobia there are a few things to march for this year…
Gay marriage (or civil partnership)
Father’s and partner’s rights for access to their children (not just gay rights)
Discrimination against teachers in their workplace (not just gay rights)
I take it you’ve seen the posts at “PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK”
I thought this post would provoke more comment.
Fiona’s post describes “coming out” as a continuous process – is it really such a repetitive experience? I would have thought it as more a definitive single one.
“A community that demands integration but hides out in gay bars and refuses to mix with any of the rest of the community doesnâ€™t deserve to be taken seriously”
That’s a very strong comment – you’re suggesting the George or somewhere is some kind of ghetto?
btw, if i remember correctly, you had a post about ex-gay ministeries coming to ireland a while back (?) – http://eve-tushnet.blogspot.com/ is a conservative lesbian Catholic has some negative things to say about them from a different perspective to yours.
Twenty: The QueerID people discuss it on their site here: http://www.queerid.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=8547
Someone thinks I’m a closet case and others throw about the “heteronormative” word – the gay alternative to “is it cos I is black?”
â€œheteronormativeâ€?, eh? You know you’re in trouble when they’re using made up words to accuse you of something.
Auds: Yeah it is repetitive. At times you feel like you have to explain yourself to people who assume you’re straight and are perplexed why you don’t react the accepted way to some things.
“No I don’t have a girlfriend.” “I can’t tell you when I’m going to settle down with a girl and get married” “No thanks I don’t want you to set me up with this girl you know that I’d like.” All been said so many times by me. Or sometimes “No, you’re a lovely girl but I’m not interested, I’m gay.” and additionally on the odd time “No, I can’t be bisexual just this once”
It’s probably worse that people are just being terribly nice and you almost disappoint them by saying “Thanks but I’m not into girls.” and “No I’m not a monk, I’m gay.”
It reminds me of the time I gave up alcohol for a year and the shit I got from people. “What’s wrong with you?” “Why won’t you have a pint and be a proper man?” “Oh right, you have a problem with drink then I take it?” It seems hard for some people to think slightly outside the box and that not all people are like them.
It does get tiring when someone new joins your social grouping or work grouping and it needs explaining (later when I’m gong) why people at the table start feeling awkward when he starts making jokes about “da fucking queers”.
As for the ghetto comment, I do think many in the gay community socially exclude themselves. I know many refuse point blank to go to straight clubs or straight bars and will only hang around with gay people. They have hardly any straight friends at all and of those the majority are women. There’s meant to be 1 in 10 gay people on average maybe 1 in 20 in Ireland yet there are so so many gay men I know of that have no heterosexual male friends. Any kind of grouping where everyone thinks, dresses and act the same is not healthy.
“Any kind of grouping where everyone thinks, dresses and act the same is not healthy.”
That goes for hetroes too I presume 😉
That goes for hetroes too I presume
Yeah, look at goths.
I have to say, I did NOT know you were gay Damien!
I dunno why that surprises me, but when I read your comment there about coming out and explaining to people why you didn’t want to be fixed up etc etc, I swear, my mouth was hanging open!
Jaysis, how did that one pass me by?! Dammit, it’s always the cute ones!
Good post though, I’ll have to go over and read Fiona’s and Suzy’s now.